1980: Marvel's Two Writing One Part III: Kowtowing Counter Earth

By Jef Willemsen (clarmindcontrol.blogspot.com)

When we last left Benjamin J. Grimm, he was chasing after his girlfriend Alicia Masters who had joined Moondragon and 1980's sensational character find Her in a search for the grave of Adam Warlock. The deceased hero's final resting place was on Counter Earth... but the planet had disappeared... and its creator the High Evolutionary was dead. Now what?

After an extended fight scene between the Thing, Starhawk, Her and Moondragon Alicia finally managed to calm everyone down. With a little help from Moondragon, Her proved she really was able to revive the dead when she reunited the High Evolutionary's mind with his body.

One fancy lightshow later and the human once known as Herbert Edgar Wyndham was a-okay... But pretty peeved when he discovered someone had stolen his planet...

It doesn't take long for Wyndham to discover a faint energy trail that would undoubtedly lead him to whoever nabbed his world. And, with no time to drop Alicia, Ben or the others off, the Evolutionary fired up the engines of his mobile moonbase and gave chase... which leads to the final chapter of this space od(d)-essy: Marvel Two In One # 63 in which we discover who made off with Counter-Earth in an impressive recap/splash page....

Take a minute to read up, go on... I'll wait.

With Counter Earth found, the question remained who took the world in the first place. Sensing the smaller orbs were actually manned tow ships, the Evolutionary teleported the heroes to the command ship, where Moondragon soon got another not so gentle reminder she wasn't all that...

"Once again, my power looks second-rate next to hers!"

Ow, don't worry about it Moonie... to those giant aliens, you  and Her both look insignificantly small. Still, sometimes you really are your own worst enemy, as Moondragon continued to berate herself.

Speaking of the control room, that's where the High Evolutionary, Ben and Alicia got teleported to by the ship's commander, Sphinxor... Who didn't need any universal translator to pick up an alien language. Heck no, he learned English by watching American sitcoms. And hilarity ensues...

Looks like the gang's all here... Time for Mark Gruenwald to go into exposition overdrive...

"My ringshippers and I were contracted to move your planet by a race of beings called the Beyonders."

Wait, there's more than one of those guys?

No, no worries... it isn't thát Beyonder. Heck, he wouldn't show up for another four years and the first Secret Wars. No, the Beyonders are a mysterious race from, well, beyond, whose curiosity was piqued when they watched the Evolutionary built his own world.

They just had to have it... And Sphinxor was happy to oblige, manipulating Warlock and his soul gem to make sure he wouldn't oppose their plans. Turning mad in the process, Warlock seemingly slew the High Evolutionary before leaving Counter Earth forever so Spinxor could work in peace.

"Okay, story time's over! Now can we clobber these stilt-leggers, take yer planet and go home?"

Well, no, not exactly. The Evolutionary, always interested in discovering new lifeforms, was intrigued by these Beyonders and struck a deal. He'd allow Sphinxor to deliver Counter Earth to the Beyonders, if he was allowed to meet them... and, of course, before delivery Her would be allowed to revive Warlock so she could start that whole perfect race this entire enterprise started out with.

Beaming down to his gravesite on Counter Earth, Her worked her magic and Adam Warlock lived again! Well, sort of...

"Return to your dank grave, o love that can never be mine! I am undone!"

Ain't that a kick in the head? What no one could have known was that moments before Warlock died in Warlock I#11, he was visited by his younger self. And, in a truly cynical and cyclical scene, Warlock the younger absorbed his older self into the soul gem.

'My life has been a failure! I welcome its end!"

Of course, if she'd known about the gem, Her would probably have tried to track down its then current owner, the elder of the universe called the Gardner. But for now, all the heartbroken super being could do, was cut her losses and leave, unsure what her goal in life was now that she's truly all alone...

"Well baby... it's over. We can go home now."

So, in the space of a mere three issues, let's review what Gruenwald had achieved, apart from telling an entertaining, bitter sweet lovestory.

• Solved the dangling 'Paragon-in-a-cocoon' plot thread by having him come out as Her.
• Set up Her as a mighty, new cosmic character for anyone to play with. Eventually he'd mostly use Her himself over in Quasar, but still.
• Explained Adam Warlock's odd behavior in his old solo book and also revealed why his infinity gem suddenly started lusting after souls. 
• Added a bit of depth and self doubt to Moondragon, even though that proved short lived once Jim Shooter used her a year later in Avengers. 
• Resurrected the High Evolutionary.
• Got rid of Counter Earth, a place no one had been using for several years anyway 
• Introduced the Beyonders, a race that years later would turn out to, according to their entry on Wikipedia, "study the Marvel Universe with amusement and curiosity."
• Having the Evolutionary meet the Beyonders set up his mental instability that would lead to 1988's Evolutionary War crossover. 

All in all, not a bad job... And that was just Gruenwald writing by himself!

Issue # 64 of Marvel Two In One marked the return of co-writer Ralph Macchio, artist extra ordinaire George Pérez and the first chapter of the Serpent Crown Affair, as we'll see in part three of

Marvel's Two Writing One: Heavy Is The Snake Head That Wears The Crown.

1980: Marvel's Two Writing One Part II: "Pow, Bang, Zoom... Straight to the Moon...Dragon"

By Jef Willemsen (clarmindcontrol.blogspot.com)

After collaborating with Mark Gruenwald on that quirky Impossible Man story in Marvel Two In One # 60, Ralph Macchio took a little break. This allowed Guenwald to pen a three part space opera that featured stolen planets, Thing spanking bald women and a transgender love story for the ages...

Let's dive in... Literally. Marvel Two In One # 61 opens with some New York harbor workers dredging up an oddly familiar looking cocoon that immediately bursts open, revealing a fiery figure that  quickly flies off...

"My metamorphosis is complete. My destination is near."

Those feet belong to one of this issue's guest stars: Her in, erm, her first appearance. However, for a fresh face, she already had quite a bit of the backstory. For one, she started out in life as man. But we'll get to that later. After taking off, she flew straight into the living room of Alicia Masters, who was just sitting down for a romantic dinner with her boyfriend, the Thing.

"It is for you I have come, Alicia Masters."

So, what does an orange skinned superwoman need with a blind sculptress? Well, here's where it gets a little complicated and continuity heavy, aka: exactly the type of story Gruenwald liked to indulge in.

Her's origin story started wayyyy back in Fantastic Four # 66 & 67, in which the FF fought thecriminal superscientists known as the Enclave. In their Citadel of Science, the evil eggheads had been working on 'Him', a genetically engineered, super powered being they deemed to be 'the perfect man'... And how does one create this ubermensch? Why, by growing him to adult size in a cocoon, of course...

"I am about to be... born!"

Incidentally, the Enclave had also kidnapped Alicia, so she happened to be present when Him emerged. He soon turned on his evil masters and left to discover the world on his own... Eventually venturing out into space and adopting the identity of Adam Warlock.

Not deterred by this colossal failure, the Enclave tried to create another perfect man in 1977's Hulk Annual # 6. But this time they were interrupted by the Hulk and Doctor Strange, causing the cocoon to open prematurely... And this guy popped out...

"Paragon? Yes, that is my name. For that is what I am... A paragon of mankind: the future and the destiny of all humanity."

Yes, of course, Paragon... in the future, we will all follow your example and dress like an ancient Egyptian with golden go go boots. Anyhoo, Paragon fought Strange and the Hulk for a bit, before pulling a Him and turning on his creators as well. He sunk their entire headquarters to the bottom of the sea and retreated into his cocoon to meditate on the question what his purpose in life ought to be. 

During that little restorative nap, Paragon still had access to the Enclave's computers through his cocoon. He used them to learn about the world and... the existence of Him. All of a sudden it hit him: he was the second perfect human. So not unlike Adam and Eve, he figured his goal in life would be to mate with Him and start the perfect race. In order to do so, Paragon underwent an extensive physical transformation and emerged from the cocoon as Her, the perfect female counterpart to the perfect man: Him. 

... Only in comics.

But now that Her was ready to go, she still had one tiny little problem: where in the world is Him? That's why she all but kidnapped Alicia. After all according to the Enclave's history of Him, she was one of the last people who saw him. Alicia had no idea where Him had gone.

Luckily our next guest star had all the answers (... as usual).

"Share your knowledge, telepath"

Of all people, Moondragon showed up to help Her find Him... She had a bit of bad news though: Him, or Adam Warlock rather, had died in battle against Thanos of Titan and was buried on Counter Earth. Her didn't seem too troubled her perfect mate was dead... She claimed to be able to raise the dead and insisted they left for Counter Earth immediately.

However, that's when Ben finally caught up with them. But despite getting back up from Starhawk of the Guardians of the Galaxy, he was yet again unable to stop Her and Moondragon from leaving Earth with Alicia. But at least he now knew where to look for them...

How Ben and Starhawk get to a planet on the outer side of the Sol system, you ask? Easy! That is, if you know how to bring in established continuity to your advantage...

"Nope. That's a Skrull saucer we snatched a long time ago."

I'll say... 

The last time the team boarded this particular craft was back in 1961's Fantastic Four # 2, when the FF defeated a Skrull infiltration team and turned them into cows... (No, really!). Before long, they were whizzing off to Counter Earth too.

Ahh, how to explain Counter Earth... Created by the High Evolutionary back in the early 70s, Counter Earth and its inhabitants were almost identical copies of our world. It was on this odd little ball of mud that Him transformed into Adam Warlock, became the Evolutionary's prized pupil and slowly took on a Christ like role... That alone was reason enough for him to be laid to rest there.

However, as Moondragon's space ship approached the location of Counter Earth, they passed its moon (actually the base of the High Evolutionary) only to make a startling discovery...

"Counter-Earth has vanished!"

They decide to board the Evolutionary's lunar headquarters to look for clues. But they are quickly overpowered by the base defenses, albeit it ever so momentarily.

"We are detained no longer."

In an interesting, added subplot, being in the presence of the extremely powerful Her made the usually smug and overbearing Moondragon feel a bit... inadequate. She even began to wonder if she really was a 'goddess', if she couldn't match Her's might. As she contemplated this, the group ran into the lifeless body of the High Evolutionary, just as you know who finally caught up...

As always, Ben rushed to judgement a bit too quickly, thinking Her and Moondragon were responsible for the Evolutionary's unfortunate fate. Once again, Alicia was unable to stop a fight from breaking out, this time because no one could hear her yelling with that classic fishbowl spacehelmet over her head. Starhawk focussed on Her, while Ben tangled with Moondragon who suffered a few blows to her ego... among other things...

"Accordin' to some 'a my pals in the Avengers, ya had this comin' to ya for some time now.

And bashful Benjy is just the guy to give it to ya!"

Well, Ben, between you and me, you're probably the first guy period to give 'it' to Heather Douglas. Ow, and the woman wrestling with Her in mid-air is Aleta, the wife of Starhawk who co-habits his body...

So, for those of you keeping score at home... We have a transgender woman fighting an essentially Siamese twin husband and wife couple, while in the corner a rock monster is spanking a bald lesbian on a fake Moon at the opposite side of our solar system.

God, aren't comics great?

Next, the search for Adam Warlock's grave site, not to mention the missing planet continues in part III of Marvel's Two Writing One: Kowtowing Counter Earth